The King of Valley, Khang, was rich, strong, and powerful man but there was hole in heart that needed to be filled. Even though Khang had a Queen Quinn and hordes of women wanting him, he could not produce a male heir for the throne. Khang had then decided to sacrifice a great beast to appeal the gods. Later that day he fought and killed a giant forest tiger. He said, "Oh gods, with this offering can you please grant me with a righteous Heir." Three Months late Quinn gave birth to four sons Anson, Stanly, Duvan, and Tyrone.
Meanwhile in a High plane, the gods were in constant war with a beast named Akuma. This creature was cruel, violent, and held a hatred for the gods. Akuma was impervious to any god and so he could not be killed by them. The head god, Zeus, then reincarnated him self into a human so that he could slay the fowl beast who killed so many of his brother. Zeus then came to earth imbued his powers into Tyrone.
As time came to pass, Tyrone and his brothers went from children to grown young men. A shaman named Tobin arrived to palace and asked the four brothers to slay a demon that has been destroying villages in close by. Tobin then Tyrone and Anson to slay the demon, Roy. When they got village, they saw that Roy was man with a snake body, whose hair was like little snake appendages. The men backed up from beast. Tyrone ready his arrow, tilted his bow, and killed the beast in one shot. The monster then turned into a pen. Confused Tyrone picked up assuming it would come into handy later.
Soon after Tyrone fell in love with a women named Sara. There love fell within two bounds heavenly and earthly since Sara was reincarnated version of Athena. Unknowing to Tyrone, Sara was the daughter if Lord Keith of the Great Mountain Kingdom. Tyrone went to city of Moubei After hearing Lord Keith's declaration. If any man can shoot an arrow and strike the bell at the very top of the mountain can become a Sara's husband. Picking up the bow Tyrone strung arrow back. He carefully aimed it and adjusted for wind. He let the arrow fly and it whistled through the air. The arrow flew at lighting speeds. Until a boom was heard. The crowd thought it was thunder but Owhen they heard the second boom they knew that bell had been struck. The couple soon got married along with all his brothers.
King Khang growing old has to make a decision for the throne Tyrone is the clear choice but his Uncle wanted Anson to get the throne so he could control him. after manipulating the king, Anson weas chosen as the next heir and Tyrone was Banished.
Authors Note:
In this rendition of the story. The main thing that has been changed is the Characters and the setting. The style too was changed so that it was easier to understand. I changed the Hindu gods to Greek gods so that the story would be less confusing to a person who never studied Indian mythos.
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| (Hindu Dieties, WebSource: wikipedia) |
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| (Greek gods, WebSource: Wikipedia) |
Bibliography:
"Ramayana."by Valmiki websource: ouocblog.blogspot
-_-..... Davis!!!!!!! It was funny how you used your roommate's name as the other sons! I am guessing Tyrone is you: / you had to use my dad’s name as the demon didn’t you! Lol. Poor choice in re naming people: / However, I liked the effort of trying to change the Indian Epic story in to Greek Mythical story. I laughed out loud when you used Tobin’s name as the shaman.
ReplyDeleteOh dear Davis… I laughed way too much at this story! Using our friends’ names for this story was priceless! My favorite part of your story was when Tyrone pulled the arrow back to win Sarah’s hand in marriage. It reminded me of when Rama pulled Vishnu’s bow to win Sita’s hand it marriage, so I appreciate the parallel comparison of those two. Just a few suggestions for your story! There were a few grammar mistakes. For example, “There love fell within two bounds…” should read “Their” instead of “There.” Also, in the sentence “Not one day would go by were a person…” I think you meant to put “where” instead of “were.” Grammar mistakes are really common, and I hate editing my own writing. You could always just read it out loud to find simple mistakes and correct them. Other than that, this story was pretty creative! Maybe write another story about King Anson ruling his kingdom!
ReplyDeleteI liked how you turned the indian epic story into a greek mythology story. I think that more people are familiar with greek mythology than with the indian epics. I noticed some mistakes in grammar, the same ones that Nicole already pointed out. I also think that adding a little dialogue would help to tell the story. Overall, I think your story was well written.
ReplyDeleteHi Davis! This was definitely an interesting rendition of this story. Firstly, using Greek gods instead of Hindu gods was an odd twist but it does make the story a little easier to follow as you described in your author’s note. I really liked your description of the city of Valei, how it made the whole valley shine. Overall, I enjoyed the changes.
ReplyDeleteDavis,
ReplyDeleteI really enjoyed you story. It was really entertaining. Something that stood out to me about your writing was the imagery. When you were describing the two kingdoms, I felt like I was there. It was so detailed. It really helped to allow the reader to imagine the setting. The breaks between the paragraphs made sense. It helped make the story flow smoothly. The transitions between the paragraphs also helped the story to flow smoothly. I just noticed a few minor errors, such as in the second to last paragraph you used “there” when you should have used “their.” I mean it was just little things. Other than that your story was really good. Your story plot was really entertaining. It held my interest until the very end of the story, despite it being a sad ending. I did not expect that. I kind of expected Tyrone to become ruler with his new wife. I look forward to reading more of you posts!